Capable of So Much More

You are personally capable of so much more than you think you are.  In fact, quite often, it's your fear that you aren't capable that's the only thing standing between you and the thing you want to do.  Fear is our worst enemy, making mountains out of mole hills and monsters out of mice.  Fear is what stops most of us from doing the great things we were meant to do.  Sadly, most of our fears are completely unfounded and, even then, our more realistic fears are worse than the reality of the situation.

Courage directs us to confront our fears, to drag those little nibblers into the light and expose them for the frauds they are.  It isn't easy, but it's always worth it.  I am not immune to fear. I often give in to it, and when I do I make a bad situation that much worse by running from it rather than confronting it head on.  I almost made that mistake twice this morning.  The first time when I was thinking about skipping out on my morning exercise.  My mind imagined my muscles sore and my body shivering because it was cold outside, but I ignored my fears and I put on my clothes and went out the door anyway.

I am blessed to live in a town with some very steep hills, and my exercise routine is that I pray the rosary as I walk up and down these hills.  At the bottom of the tallest and steepest hill, I have recently stepped up my exercise to include jogging to the top each time I come to it.  The first day, it took everything I had in me to jog to the top 1 time.  Today, however, I was able to jog up to the top of that hill 6 times. I was capable of more than I thought I was, but I was only able to find that out after confronting my fear.

The second time I nearly made this mistake was when I saw it was my landlords on the phone. I am late on rent again, and was ashamed of that fact. We're still recovering from the financial problems caused by the theft of our van two months ago, but we're nearly out of that hole.  However, I put my big girl panties on and answered the phone, explaining that we would be in on Tuesday to make a payment.  The girl thanked me for the information and told me that we owed $150 less than usual this month because we had overpaid and because our landlord had waived the late fee! I wanted to rejoice!! What a wonderful Christmas present to us.  This means we will be able to get completely back on our feet by the end of this month.

The truth is the last two months have all been God's way of teaching me that I am capable of more than I think I am, and that I need to push myself harder to confront my fears rather than run from them.  My life is getting better by the day because I'm allowing Him to teach me.  My New Year's Resolution is to confront fears rather than run.  What's yours?

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